Real Darby Facts

OBSESSED WITH "ZONING" IN OUR TOWN -- THE LAST THING THIS TOWN NEEDS IS A "ZONE!" WHO IS GOING TO PAY FOR STALKERS? THE TAXPAYERS!

SENSITIVE ABOUT DEAD MOM: HOW DO YOU EXPECT HIM TO KEEP A COOL HEAD WHEN THE RED TELEPHONE RINGS??

WHY DOESN'T HE WEAR SANDALS OR OPEN-TOED SHOES? WEIRD FEET?

SEEN IN PARKING LOT WITH GOOSE, NO ONE ELSE AROUND TO PROVE THAT THEY DIDN'T DO "THAT"

KNOWN TO HANG OUT NEAR "THAT RV IN THE BEST BUY PARKING LOT"

SMELLS

REFUSES TO ACCEPT THAT THE NATURE OF REALITY IS FUNDAMENTALLY PARADOXICAL

HAS NOT PIERCED THE VEIL